I can't remember ever being as exhausted and tired of work as I have been this year (and trust me, last year was a HELL year!) and it's taken me a LONG time to figure out what was wrong.
All of the staff I am with through the day have been incredibly NEGATIVE and it's extremely tiring to be around. EVERY single day is filled with complaining and bitching and plain old being mean. I'm somewhat to fault for this for keeping my mouth shut. No I'm not an angel, I do some of the bitching too. The difference between me and the other (2 specifically) is mine is not constant AND I haven't been putting someone else in the uncomfortable position of being in the middle of things. I'm too tired to argue and if I ask them to stop or if I try to say the opposite of what they're saying about some of the other people we work with it turs into a fight. It's just not worth it (to my mental health).
I've made the decision to actively look for something different (and by different I think I need to even change fields I work in. I'M TOO BURNT OUT) after I get back from my holiday in July.
I'm too young to be hating my life lol.
and on that note I'm going to put in something positive I found on Sheri's blog and was given permission from her to put here. (sorry if I'm babbling)
Heavenly Father, Help us remember that the jerk who cut us off in traffic last night is a single mother who worked nine hours that day and is rushing home to cook dinner, help with homework, do the laundry and spend a few precious moments with her children.
Help us to remember that the pierced, tattooed, disinterested young man who can't make change correctly is a worried 19-year-old college student, balancing his apprehension over final exams with his fear of not getting his student loans for next semester.
Remind us, Lord, that the scary looking bum, begging for money in the same spot every day (who really ought to get a job!) is a slave to addictions that we can only imagine in our worst nightmares.
Help us to remember that the old couple walking annoyingly slow through the store aisles and blocking our shopping progress are savoring this moment, knowing that, based on the biopsy report she got back last week, this will be the last year that they go shopping together.
Heavenly Father, remind us each day that, of all the gifts you give us, the greatest gift is love. It is not enough to share that love with those we hold dear. Open our hearts not to just those who are close to us, but to all humanity. Let us be slow to judge and quick to forgive, show patience, empathy and love.